it was supposed to be a fun night out, but in the end, it turned out to be a nightmare, a disaster. an incident that i have never ever thought that it could have happened to me, an incident that i know will haunt me forever, an incident that i wish it was just a dream. i had my first and worst argument with my best friend, a friend whom i've known for years. she used to be a part of me, and now it seems like she's slowly slipping away. we've known each other for years, we've shared our ups and downs together, sadness and laughter, we've had misunderstandings, disagreements but we've never had an argument, not until today; our first and largest one ever.

shits happened that night, lots of factors contributed to the start of the bitter argument, it's too long of a story. then i've been thinking, what triggered her emotion that causes her to lose her temper just like that, all of a sudden as i've NEVER seen her acting like that before. i tried to listen and keep my mouth shut because i do not want to make things worst, but i have my limits too. in the end, i kinda lost my patience and tolerance, that i couldn't take her shouting and blaming any longer and that's when i burst out as well. i couldn't take it already, that it's as if EVERYTIME and EVERYTHING was my fault and she's being unreasonable and ridiculous. it was HORRENDOUS.

i do wish that it is just a dream, that when i wake up from the dream, everything is back to normal again, as if nothing has happened. but as i woke up and opened my eyes, i know that everything is real and i'm still in disbelief. i have to accept the fact that it does happened. time is all i need to heal the wound. whatever it is, i know that our so-called lifetime friendship will never be the same again, and it never will. i'm losing my very one and true best friend. it's indescribable. i'll never forget 15th July 2007.

"Wong, i'm extremely sorry for getting you into this and please don't feel bad and start blaming on yourself because it's not your fault. i'm so embarrass that you and the guys have to see all these. thank you so much for the concern and words of encouragement. and Andy Wong, thanks for the call and concern. all the best to you in Beijing."