my life is changing drastically since i started my training. i'm living in this boring and exhausting life everyday. i need to get up freaking early in the morning everyday, at 4:30am. go for classes then come home late in the evening. no more online, no more going out with friends at night, all i do is sleep, sleep and sleep. i'm like a total different person now, both physically and mentally. family are so surprised to see the changes in me, and i believe my friends will be shocked too. i'm turning from a funky looking girl to an elegant lady. sigh... I'M NOT ME ANYMORE!!! the ladies are required to wear pants or skirts with jacket on (suits), makeup and hair tied up nicely. gentlemen with collar shirt and tie. we must look NEAT. it makes me look like a career woman and i don't like it. i'm too young to dress that way and it makes me look much older, but i have no choice.

there's an extremely big hole in my pocket. haven't got my pay yet and i've been spending way too much from what we're getting. suits and makeup are not cheap. for the very first time, at the age of 22, i owned my very own complete set of cosmetics; from foundation to concealer, eyeliner to brow pencil, eyeshadows, mascara, blusher, lipstick and finishing powder. everything cost me a bomb. i even spent more than i can earned. this is freaking sad.

suddenly i'm thinking of "Him" and i miss "Him"...